Monday, August 30, 2010

The Girl and the Violin

Once upon a time, I played my violin religiously. Well, I actually complained a lot about practicing and didn't do it, and when I did, it was far from religiously. But the point is that when I did practice, I sounded great (the beauty of being musically inclined) and really did enjoy it for the most part. So why am I telling you guys this?

Because I quit my job.

No, no, no. I am not going to pack up my belongings and play on a street corner somewhere in hopes that some random strangers, feeling touched after a Bach sonata, will give me money to live off of. Not at all. Although, buskering (playing on streets and at fairs and stuff for pocket change) is pretty enjoyable. Truth be told, I like performing in groups and in places where no one is really paying attention. It's fun and not stressful like solo performances at a recital are.

Again, not the point. My bad.

I quit my job for a number of reasons, actually, including but not limited to the fact that I hate working 4 am shifts and that my job was threatened over something that was not my fault.

But the main one is that I am sick of answering to the man. That's right. I am tired of having corporate used as a threat above my head, I am tired of working everyone else's hours, and I am tired of having to act like it's ok. Cause it's not. That is not how you lead or manage people, and I know that from my parents and from my years as a Girl Scout.

So I quit my job and next Wed. is my official last day. Great. What the heck am I going to do and what does this have to do with the story of me and my lousy practice habits?

You see, teaching is one my ambitions in life. I know I am never going to make a fortune off of it, and I know that it's a hard job to have. I know that some teachers get very little respect for what they do. But it is a noble thing, teaching the next generation, so to speak. I see the odds, and I also see the rewards, and frankly, if I can make a difference for one student, then I will feel like my time here has been worth it.

Which brings me to what I am going to do after I finish at Bagel Hell. I am going to teach violin.

That's right. I am pulling my beloved instrument out (I really do love it; it's a part of me that I will never be able to get away from) and am going to offer private instruction to beginner students. It's not going to be super profitable (if I wanted profitable, I'd stay where I am and be miserable) and it's going to take some time to get set up, but in the end, I feel it is going to be worth it.

I wouldn't feel I could do this if I didn't live at home, if my college wasn't paid for via a student loan, and if my savings wasn't built up. I have the perfect alignement, it seems, to pull this off.

I have not felt happier. I am going to do something my dad has been trying to get me to do for a while now: I'm going to be my own boss. It's going to rock. And I'm doing something that I love, which is a plus. I seriously do not care if I live off of peanuts as long as I am doing something I love and care about. If you don't care about or enjoy what you do, you shouldn't do it.

On that note, I'm auditioning for an orchestra next Tuesday. I think I'm going to audition with "the Swan" by Saint-Saens. I'm pretty excited; playing in an orchestra is like no other experience. It's fun, it's crazy, the music is usually good, and performing is a blast.

And now the homework beast is calling, so I must leave you for now. Until we meet again, dear readers.


Wednesday, August 25, 2010

What the Heck is with All These DRAFTS?!?!?

I just realized, I have like five unfinished blog updates in various stages of completion waiting to be posted. There's no way that stuff's relevent now (as if it ever was, right?), so there's no way I'm going to post them.

But just so you know, my Cyberland Readers, based on the draft count, I have been thinking about you.

For whatever that's worth.

And now I'm leaving you, because I am nasty sick and I have to feel somewhat better, because I not only have a full day of classes tomorrow, but I'm also turning in my notice at work.

Oh yeah. I forgot to tell you guys about that. Let's see...

I decided that the bagel shop was not worth the 8 dollars an hour that I make. I mean, I've had my job threatened over something that wasn't my fault, I've had to take abuse from customers, the fear of corporate has been held over me one too many times, and I basically dread going to work. So I'm leaving.

Instead, I'm going to try this thing of violin teaching. As a classically trained violinist, I enjoy my instrument and the craft behind it, and as teaching is my ultimate ideal profession (it's either that or be a professional improv player, but that one is a long way away and pretty unlikely as a career, lol), then teaching violin for pocket cash is ideal.

We shall see how it turns out; wish me luck.

And now I really do have to go. I mean, I can barely focus (again, like I do already?) - it's worse than a freaking hamster, ok? Plus, my throat is so swollen that I can barely swallow, and talking. Don't even get me started on talking - I sound like a drinking, chain smoker from the '70's. Gah.

I'll update again at some point, mark my words.

Oh, and did I mention that I'm hitting the Harry Potter stuff hard again? I think I may be in love with the George/Luna pairing. No, it's not canon; yes, my sister thinks I've lost my mind. But really, when have I ever truly had it? That's right, moot point.

For real, I'm going.

Have a great night, Cyberland Readers, and don't get sick. It's not fun.


Friday, August 13, 2010

Attention Blogger: It's An Update!

I once again have no excuse. But hey, I'm updating now, so that totally counts and nullifies my lack of excuse for updating, right? Right.

So how's it kicking with you guys? Life online good? Excellent.

Alright, enough small talk. Time for the mass fill in of my past few weeks.

The brief end: I tried smoking, resumed improv, cut again, found God again, almost lost my job, came to terms with almost losing said job, start school for fall semester on Tuesday, and am having a friend from the west coast come in next week for a day.

Oh yeah, try to make sense of that. But that's why you have me here, dear Cyberland Readers. So that I can break it down for you. You know you are dying to hear about all of it.

Let's start with smoking. I always said I would never try the stuff, cause it's bad for you and expensive, and a nasty habit. But the truth is, I was curious. And I wanted to get carded. I mean, I'm 20 years old and have never done anything really rebellious, dangerous, or that warrents getting carded. I'm about as exciting as a box of Cracker Jacks without a prize in that respect. So I went to 7 - 11 with my sister, bought a lighter and a peach cigar, and smoked it on the deck.

It was great. I have no shame in admiting that I enjoyed basically every minute of it. Afterwards, my mom threatened to take my lighter, told me I'm never allowed to smoke again while I'm living at home, and told me I needed a shower.

I have no regrets, and I fully plan on doing it again. Yeah, there are health risks. Yeah, it's a bad habit. But I like it, and I think I can get away with being a casual smoker, at least for a while. You only live once, and I'm tired of being scared to do things because of what they may do to me 50 years down the road. And hey, at least it's not pot, cause I know people who do that, and that's one thing I won't do. I have standards.

Next on the agenda: improv.

Improv is off to a great start after a month long hiatus. We are all still funny, it is still fun, and now we're getting my sister into it, which is great. She's a natural, she just doesn't know it yet. :D That's really all there is to say about that one. Hopefully we'll have a competition soon, cause those are brilliant.

Cutting was bad. That's all there is to say about that. Let's move on...

I found God again. I started reading my Bible and things finally feel relevant. It's one of those things of belief. I'm very much a head person (i.e. my head is very powerful and I over think things), so it's hard for me to believe just what my heart or soul tells me.

But you know what? I'm doing it. It may be the size of a frickin mustard seed, but I'm going to move mountains with it, even if I don't know how or when or why. I feel very uplifted right now, and I love it. I've had a chronic headache for the past two weeks or more, and it's gone now. It's a good thing.

It's a very good thing.

So, the job thing.

It's a long story and I don't feel like going into great detail, but basically my drawer was short $25 the other day due to the fact that a fellow manager and I couldn't figure out an incident with a gift card. My boss called me yesterday and basically told me that if corporate couldn't figure out what had happened, one or both of us (the other manager and I) would lose our jobs.

So yeah. I've never been fired before, and the idea scared the hell out of me, so I cried when I got off the phone. After making sure that my parents weren't going to be disappointed in me if I was fired (they are awesome, let me tell you), and after figuring out a positive plan for the worst case scenario, I felt better about it.

Today, I went to work and fully expected to be asked to leave. Instead, I found out that my boss had found out yesterday that both of our jobs were secure. Why he didn't bother to tell me yesterday is a mystery, but I'm still employed, so I'm not going to worry about it. Still, the company is bothering me a little.

I'm going to give it until the end of the year, and then decide how I feel. End of story.

School starts Tuesday. I can not wait. This summer felt so long, and I've been working so much. I need something to break it up, and this is it. Plus, since I changed my major, my classes are going to be a lot more fun than before.

It all brings me one step closer to teaching your children. That's right. Your children are going to learn English from me. Are you scared yed?

And finally, my friend from Seattle, GizmonicGirl92, is passing through Denver this week! There's a chance (a pretty good chance, actually) that I'm going to get to see her on Wedensday! She's my friend I met on this forum ( ). We have a lot in common, and she's a lot of fun to talk to. I have yet to meet her face-to-face, though, so I'm excited and a little nervous. It should be fun, though.

And yes, both our moms will be there. :D

Ok, Cyberland Readers, that's enough for now. I'm tired and work basically open to close tomorrow. Until the next go,