Thursday, April 26, 2012

My Brain is Exploding.

But hey, at least graduation is nearly here.

That's my excuse every time I get on Minecraft between classes.  I'm nearly done.  So I can play with my sheep.

(If you don't understand, google Minecraft.)

I've been making a mental list of all the knitting projects I'm going to finish.  It is as follows:

~Surprise for my sister (I'll reveal after her b-day)
~Red shawl for my neighbor
~Green and gold shrug for me
~Pink baby blanket for a friend of mine's grand kid
~Bluegreen alpaca lace shawl for me

Plus I really want to make that tunic for my sister that I created last week.

And I need more socks. 

As does my boyfriend.

And I really want to design some wicked cool stuff this summer.

All I want to do this summer is listen to music, spend time with the people who matter, knit, design, knit what I desgin, collect more paint chips from Home Depot, and swim.  And work my job on the weekends.

Ahhh. 

Two more papers.  Then capstone reading, humanities award ceremony, graduation ceremony, and graduation party.

And then breathing.

~Meaghan

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Ahhhh...

I was going to post about how annoyed I am with politics, rich people, and the summer itch when I still have a week and a half of school left.  But instead, because I'm strange like that, I'm going to post about knitting.

Yesterday, for the first time nearly all semester it seems, I was able to relax enough to design a new project.  Not just any project.  My first design exploration into large articles of clothing.

This may not seem exciting or thrilling to anyone else, but to me, it's huge.  I've been doing hats for a few months, and of course socks and scarves.  But tops?  Wow.

I've just finished a yellow vanilla scented (yes, you read right, the yarn is scented) cotton wash cloth and I've been thinking about how nice cotton feels.  It's a little strange to work with until you get used to it, but then it feels lovely - cool, thick, and non scratchy.  It's really nice.

So why not make a summer top for my sister (who's petite and therefore will use less yarn and who I've been promising to create stuff for her forever) out of cotton?  Thus, it's been born.

Seed stitch edging on the top.  Stockinette stitch body.  Picot edge bind off.  Straps out of seed stitch that are picked up in the back and then button over the shoulder.  Subtle shaping at the waist, but knitted in the round as a tube in essence.

(I'm excited by this.)

I sketched it out and then made a gauge swatch.  It's going to be awesome! 

And until I can afford the yarn (mid to end of May), I  plan on finishing my own cardigan (better late than never), a shawl, and a baby blanket.

Ahh yes.  It feels good to be creative.

Friday, April 20, 2012

They've Updated My Blogger Thing

So that's what happens when you vanish for a while.  Stuff gets updated.  Interesting...

I want eveyrone to know I have no idea where this blog post is going.  I've done homework off and on all morning, much like I have the past week, so my brain is a bit on the fried in. Which is fine.  I think I need to stop thinking for a while anyway.

I can not wait for summer.  Two more weeks of school (one paper, two finals, a capstone reading, and various other things) and then I get to graduate!  Oh geez.  Graduation.  I'm thrilled and terrified.  Absolutely.

People keep asking me what my plan is for when I finish.  I don't have one.  I don't feel like I need one.  I mean, whatever I'm supposed to do, I'll get there eventually so why get myself worked up? 

(On the other hand, I like having plans, but don't tell them.)

I'm really ready to go swimming.  Really and truly.  Swimming, pool, summer, lemonade, bbq, margaritas - summer sounds fabulous.

And that's all I have for today.  Keep it real, my peeps. :)

~Meaghan

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Rethinking Things

So much has happened the past few weeks.  I'm honestly not sure where to begin.  Some of it's not mine to tell.

What I've learned is that when it comes to things and people I care about, I'm stronger than I ever thought possible.

But I have so much on my mind.  Thoughts about God, about pro life and pro choice, about life in general.

I practice a mixture of whatever comes my way.  I believe in God, or Goddess, whichever.  I think they're one and the same.  I know that energy is real; I've felt it in my hands.  I know prayer is powerful; that's why I pray every day, nearly all day at times.  I read my Bible, I carry Goddess cards, and I light candles when I pray or need to calm down.  I know color has an effect, as does smell, and I try to knit with colors that call to me.  (Pink, anyone?)

I have always said I refuse to see the world as black and white.  And I think now, I have just been introduced to yet another shade of gray.  What if I'm wrong?  What if...what if there is a hell, and what if there is heaven?

I could write what I'm feeling (confusion, emptiness, overwhelming everything) off as being stressed because of school and life.  But I don't think that's the case.  I think God is trying to reach me.  Frankly, I'm incredibly resistant right now.

Why?  Well, I know a lot of people who are Christians who really just annoy me.  One of them has told me God is disappointed that I am intimate with my boyfriend and that the fact we're talking about living together before marriage is wrong.  I've also been told that I'm probably going to hell (in nicer terms, mind you) because I don't unquestioningly follow Jesus.

I've always had questions, I've always had thirst.  That's why I read whatever I can get my hands on about everything.  I've explored other religions and myths and stories and faiths and whatever else.  It's not like I don't believe in a higher power.  I don't believe in chance and I don't believe things just happen.  I don't believe we're alone on the Earth. 

But it's so hard.  My dad says I'm making it harder on myself and that I should really just relax and accept Grace.  Maybe he's right.  But I'm incredibly stubborn.

So maybe God's trying to reach me.  And maybe I'm being resentful and denying it.  And maybe I should stop.

My head is spinning right now.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

I'm Back!

Holy cow, dear readers.  I am so sorry to leave you in such a lurch.

It has been one thing after another, but I will not bore you with the details.  Just know that it's been a looong month and I'm happy to be back.

I will get back on an even keel here and start updating more regularly once things settle down a bit.  (End of semester crunch and graduation stuff, you know how it goes...)

Thank you so much for your patience.  You are awesome. :)

~Meaghan