Noise

Hey there, dear readers.

Lately, I've been so full of confusion and chaos, it isn't even funny.  Where do I go next?  Should I get a full time job?  Should I go back to school?  Or should I just keep doing what I'm doing?

Don't get me wrong, I love what I'm doing.  I love knitting, designing, watching my neighbor's son.  But part of me is bored.  I don't know why.  I feel like something is missing; I miss being in school.

Which I guess is good enough reason to go back.  If I go back, it'll be online.  I crave knowledge, but not other people at the moment.  It wears me out being around too many folks.  Go figure that.

What will I do?

I've been praying so much about the jobs I've applied for, about direction and guidance.  But the noise in my head is so loud most times that I can't hear beyond my own anxious, racing breath.

How do you find a center?  How do you let the Devine guide you and ultimately trust that it will be the right path?

And these are questions that have no permanent answer it seems.  We live and love and trust, and deep in our souls we know the presence of that higher power, the one who steers us through the course of our lives.

I suppose the biggest thing is to breathe.  That's probably a good start.  Calm in, worry out.  Peace in, anger out.  Love in, bitterness out.

It's a mantra, isn't it?  I just realized that.  Counting breaths is like counting waves.  Calm.  Constant.  Echos of echos on the wind.

I digress. 

I think I shall take my own advice and go count my breathing.

~Meaghan